damn.

I usually put 500 of each paycheck in my savings, this week I spent all of it... I'm slipping.
no more alcohol. no more fast food. no more fucking gas money-I have a bike, god dammit. saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaveeeeeeeee!!!!!!! I need that money for later... either college-or trips :]

anyways, I still feel sick from thursday night. which I'm about to divulge into riiiiiiiight neeoowww.

so thursday I went with josh to his apartment for a party we were gonna have that night. we threw that GIGANTIC bottle of grey goose in the freezer and started cleaning up the mess that was his abode. it looked like nobody had lived there for weeks... which was true... so anyways, christie showed up and we had already started drinking. bad choice on my part. I remember tyson, craig & crew, jay's brothers, these black girls, and the stripper neighbor-who I wouldn't stop flirting with apparently.
after everyone got there, and I had my encounter with the stripper lady, I don't remember anything. jay said I was dancing with christie and getting down like I was a "female"; I guess he told me to stop because I was making the guys uncomfortable. I really can't stand fucking gender roles. fucking pisses me off. why can't I just be my self around others and be accepted?people are too insecure about themselves. oh well, but apparently jay beat up tyson and I passed out on josh's bed. jay carried me to his car, cos we had to leave-police were coming-so we headed to his brother sean's place. he helped me up the stairs and plopped me onto a bed. I remember smelling a shoe by my face, but I was too lazy to move it. dammit.
all I know is, when I woke up that morning I was still drunk and I had to watch some show called the 700 club (christian bullshit) til jay woke up. I think they almost converted my soggy brain in one hour. those shows are pretty convincing, I mean the dude healed this lady's fibromyalgia AND healed someone's alcoholism. through skype. fucking bad ass, right? baby jesus sure was working through his sausage-like fingers, fo'sho. ofcourse when I finally felt sober(yesterday morning) I reflected back on what I had seen and felt retarded. never again.